Have you experienced various trials and tribulations throughout your life? Did you feel like something needed to change, but you didn’t know what? Did you feel like you were heading for a serious downward spiral?
In 2015, I felt all of those things, I just knew that my life was out of control and I was heading nowhere — but somewhere — FAST! Everything was spinning out of control and there was no emergency brake to employ. I had no clue what the bottom would look like and honestly, I was beyond terrified.
The bottom had fallen out of everything for the last time. When I say everything, I mean everything — I was in yet another romantic relationship that failed, my account was on “E,” I needed to move, I was injured and the job was a source of contention. At this point I was in the thick of it, or at least I thought I was.
I had two choices, try to fight my way out of this paper bag or wallow in self-pity. Honestly, I probably did both. I had to find housing and maintain my job. Soon that all proved to be too much. I blamed my circumstances on everyone that I could. Truthfully, there were some that were to blame, but most of the blame rested on my shoulders. I was always the one people assumed had it all together and I allowed them to believe that.
It took me nine months to come to the conclusion that it was time. It was time for me to cut my losses and make the hardest choices of all; I had to leave my child and grandchild. That was the hardest of all — considering we had never been apart. It hurt me more than it did them. I packed my car, put everything in storage and left the state with a 40+ gallon tote and a few items.
It took me a year to decide that I had had enough of being hurt and angry. I was mad at the world and everyone close to me — with the exception of my child and mother. The time had finally come to put the rubber to the road. (I really want to use another term but.... well yea) “It was time to s... or get off the pot as the old folks would say.” Put on and pull up my big girl panties.” You get the point.
Given that I was raised in the church, I knew that it was time to go back to my roots. God was my natural choice.
So, as you can see, I can relate on many levels. I hope that if you find,or have found, yourself in the same or similar positions, that you make a choice. A choice that leads you to choose you! Your choice to change your life may lead you down the same path or a different path. As long as the choice is made that you can commit to.
I am grateful for the choice that I made. Had I not, you would not be reading these very words. This my friend was the beginning of my 2-year journey to wholeness, finding my identity, and my purpose. This is what has led me to this very place to meet you. Let me introduce myself, "Hi, my name is Tenishia. Nice to meet you."
Imagine where life can lead you with just one decision...the possibilities are endless!
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